Exchange Student
I am nearly 19 years old. I have been with my boyfriend for just over 3
years now. We have just finished our first year of Uni; both of us went to
the same one and lived at the same college. The college that we live at has
a lot of exchange students from all over the world. Towards the end of the
Uni year, I started to have feelings for one of these exchange students. Of
course this guy had to go home so now he is on the other side of the world,
but I still think that I have feelings for him.
My relationship with my boyfriend has been through a few hard times before,
we always figured it out, but I'm having trouble forgetting about the
exchange student. He treated me in such a different way to what my boyfriend
does, and I think it's more like how I would like to be treated. My
boyfriend's mum is terminally ill and is not expected to live much longer.
I was looking to end the relationship but I am afraid that he won't be able to
cope with the break up as well as his mum's sickness, and I'm worried about
what it would do to his mum's condition. I still care so much for him, I'm
just not sure that its right for me to stay with him if I have had feelings
for someone else.
Sarah
Charmaine:There's also the issue of compassion and sensitive timing. If you have
decided definitely to end your relationship, it's okay to wait till a time
when your boyfriend is not going through such a painful situation. It
doesn't mean you're being hypocritical.
This will also give you the chance to really think about what you want. If
you are honest with your guy about these other feelings you had, maybe he
might get a wake-up call and improve his treatment of you. Don't give him up
without the chance for him to change. After all, you said it was mainly
about the way the other guy behaved towards you. You certainly have every
right to get the best out of any relationship you're involved with. Focus,
think clearly, step out of emotion then decide. Talk to your boyfriend
initially once the time feels right, and go from there.
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