Get the hint

My boyfriend broke up with me 4 days ago which was 6 days after our year and a half anniversary. He's 18 and I'm 20, he's doing his yr 12, and I'm in second year uni. We always used to fight constantly but we would make up and everything would be fine.

But lately as exams are approaching, he said he couldn't be bothered with the relationship anymore and said it had nothing to do with me. He said he still loves me and I thought to myself that if he did, why did he do it? I asked him if we could get back together after exams and he said no. I'm having a really hard time dealing with this as he's done this to me so many times in the past and I've always given it a second chance. I noticed some changes in the relationship when we talked on the phone, he would seem distant. All my friends said that he was stressed, but stress doesn't cause that much tension that you break up with someone so quickly. I only saw him once a week and our parents don't know about our relationship. He's my first boyfriend and I've always put him before my self in any situation.

He sometimes used to tell me that he had a feeling we were going to break up at the end of this year and I said not to be negative!! At that time I was trying to be positive and he started to be the opposite so he said that he wouldn't think about it anymore. I really don't know what to think about the situation.

I'm extremely hurt because I am so emotionally attached to him. I can't sleep, can't study, haven't eaten.. I feel like I have nothing left. Do you think he will come around after exams? He hasn't called me because he said that if I don't want him to, then he won't. I miss him so much and I know I still love him. Why has he done this to me, I don't know. Another person said that he finally got the chance to get it out and he was anticipating for that moment for a long long time. But he just said that in the spur of the moment, just because I said he was acting distant. If I kept my mouth shut, he wouldn't have said anything.

Please help!
Veronica

Charmaine:
Actually stress can cause people to make hasty emotional decisions that are later regretted. But I don't feel that's the case here. I think this guy has been uncertain about his feelings for a long time andis using exam stress as a convenient excuse to break it off.

I don't want to upset you but it's better to face the harsh truth than continue waiting and believing he's coming back. You want to believe that he just made an impulsive decision but as you said yourself, this situation has been going on for a long time.

I really think at your age that you should start loving yourself more and demanding to be treated better. You've handed far too much power over to this guy and he's abused it. It's an important life-lesson, one that will hold you in good stead for the future.




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